Hello, my name is mom and

I feed my children Kraft dinner at least three times a week.

My name is mom and

I rarely brush my children’s teeth more than once a day.

My name is mom and

sometimes I discipline my children with spanks.

My name is mom and

my daughter is very familiar with Netflix.

My name is mom and

I let my clingy son scream at my feet while I cook dinner.

My name is mom and

I nap during nap time instead of cleaning.

My name is mom and

sometimes my children make me so angry I want to slap them in the face (I don’t).

My name is mom and

I give my one year old juice (not always watered down!).

My name is mom and

I didn’t finish potty training my daughter until after her third birthday.

My name is mom and

I relish leaving my kids with others so I can get out on my own, even for a whole night with my man.

My name is mom and

from week one I made sure my babies would take the bottle so I could pass the puck to my husband for every other night feed.

My name is mom and

I love my children more than anything in the whole world.

My name is mom and

my children are thriving.

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