I’m busy. I recently heard a host on CBC radio quoting a study that stated that if you don’t call yourself “busy” then you won’t be. I’m not sure that I agree. I’m busy, and I say this with the full understanding that my busyness is of my own making. Perhaps a life with two children is chronically busy for any person but no one forces me to add to that classes, sewing, blogging and of late, re-painting my house.
I’m not complaining. I have a good, good life and it is a blessing to be able to say that any stress I experience in life is usually self imposed by my chosen activities. To an extent, I thrive on this busyness. I love seeing the results of my hard work and the beauty that I am able to create and it somehow leaves me more aware of the beauty of God as the Creator.
However, in all this busyness, this thriving, stressing, and enjoying, I can sometimes lose sight of my children. Not to say that they aren’t clean, well fed, well loved little individuals, but I start to feel like they are getting in the way of what I rather be doing. Sometimes I am working so hard to get things done that I can spend a whole day not really seeing them. It is easy for me to feel like their needs are another thing that I just “need to get done”.
What is it for me to “see”my children? For me, it is to not just pass over them and live through my day with them hanging off my side but rather take time to look at who they are as little individuals. When I take the time to fully surrender my attention to them I am awed. Sofia has become her own little person: vivacious, zany, fiery, loving, insatiable in her thirst for entertainment and knowledge. Charlie is on his way to becoming a little man himself: goofy, coy, affectionate, sweet, with an insatiable thirst for well…breastmilk.
They are so precious and though I struggle at times to take a break and give them my full attention, when I do, what I see is my greatest joy. Charlie, Sofia, know that your busy mama sees you, values you, and loves you to bits and pieces.